When I was in my first year of sobriety I started working with other alcoholics because I was on Step 12, and my physical homegroup wasn't getting any newcomers so I took to the internet-AAS actually, to carry out Step 12. I didn't understand how that was gonna keep me sober and growing, but I was willing to go to any lengths and didn't need to fully comprehend what those before me did-I trusted that it worked, witnessed it work and then experienced it working.
My first couple of years in were brutal-not because I "craved" alcohol or that life again-but because of the residue and drama generated by my choices and a host of defects that were deeply woven into everything I thought, did and said. Step 12 changed my life because for the first time I wasn't hyper focused on doing the bidding of my defects or keeping up a facade to ensure I was liked, loved or revered. I was, and am still very candid about my experiences and they are not all pretty and don't always paint me in the best light.-but, they had purpose now and in the light of truth could actually help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail.
Now instead of me looking to be helped, I was the one who was seeking to help others-which paradoxically helps me because that's how service to others/God works. Securing confidence by being truthful about my experience and if that rang true to the next sick and suffering alcoholic who needed to hear it-awesome! Who it rings true to or how it was received didn't matter-all that mattered was that I suited up and showed up and not like I did before which was in the form of people pleasing to keep up with or create another ego identity.
A real alcoholic needs to hear truth-so when I heard some of my story through some of your experience, I could start to get honest with myself because no one was there with motive to change, fix, control me; so my state went from being on guard, rebellious and suspicious, to accepting and willing to hear more because the heart hears truth-even if those words aren't beautifully stated. Basically it's like, "Here, do you want it...we have a way out if you do-if not, we are if and when you do"- WOW...what freedom, and what a realization that everything wasn't all about me!!
The more of us that are out here willing to suit up and show up, to stand in the truth of our experience and extend our hand to someone that drowning instead of passing the buck, looking to be helped or thinking that our story or experience isn't that important, the more opportunities more different types of women will be able to hear God through you.
I don't relate to everyone, and everyone can't relate to me and once I stopped worry about that another layer that was blocking me off from the sunlight of the Spirit was removed. I don't have to be all thing for all people, I can just be me and maybe my story and experiences in sobriety will help someone today-or not, but at least I suited up and I showed up and asked God, how may I serve you today? It may not be sexy or all that stimulating, but, its anchored in truth and that it good.
Chop Wood Carry Water