I have been doing some deep meditation and diving into the word acceptance and how it came to be a part of the fellowship-not program. Just because it appears in one story from a fellow member from one edition, doesn't mean it's the program. The program is located in the first part of the book in all editions. The stories in the back are for identification purposes. So for example, if they had chosen me to write my experience with AA in the latest revision and a generation later people were quoting from my story as the program, rather than just my experience, that would be unfortunate.
Back to the word acceptance that we have countless meetings about. It always bothered me because everything is kind of just thrown under the acceptance label.
The fact is that acceptance means approval. Mind you, I am coming from a place of doing a deep dive on the entire origin of the American English language factoring in the legal and the spiritual ramifications and how words are in fact energy-and if you get enough people saying them out of context then the definition changes as well as the initial intention.
I'm not going to bore everyone with the details as I am just saying that I have found that acceptance/approval is NOT the answer to all my problems or whatever that person said. Maybe for the writer it was, but, I am a living breathing human inspirited being who does not approve of everything-that would be ridiculous and highly irresponsible. God didn't create us, just approve of everything and everyone and not practice discernment-in my opinion.
I don't not accept pedophilia's
I do not accept certain political beliefs
I do not accept certain movies to be played in my home
I do not accept drug use in my home.
To say that I can be happy if I approve, allow and accept all the horror that goes on is absolutely insane in my opinion.
So I would counter the writer sharing their experience and even the serenity prayer and say, the answer to all my problems is to trust God and ask God to grant me the proper discernment that will start to bring me into remembrance as to how to make a sound decision about what I will or will not allow into my home, eyes and ears based upon my core knowingness and grant me the courage to stand behind that decision so that I my then show others what it looks like to have courage instead of just going along with things that my soul abhors to avoid real responsibility. There is a huge responsibility in saying NO, not on my watch. Not in my home. I love you but I do not approve and then being ok that everyone hates me. That is called integrity. Integrity builds character.
My motto-(doesn't have to be yours) nor does the fellowship need to adopt it as part of the program and do meetings about it is:
Observe
Discern
Decide
Stand
Observe what's going on and or what they are doing
Discern if it is right or wrong based upon how my gut feels
Decide if I want to align myself to them or it spiritually, mentally and physically
Stand in the decision-asking God to grant me continued courage and strength to stand my ground.
And say further down the line I am given some new information and I have to reexamine that belief that I held firm on....do I continue to stay in that belief because I am too embarrassed to change my mind because God forbid I was wrong???...hell no!! I let go of the old and allow the new information in. I don't stay stuck out of fear of being wrong. Being wrong is fine as long as I comprehend that and address any harm caused to others by my belief system at the time if they were in my care.
I used to be totally fine with certain things, however in light of new information and my capacity to grow, expand and contract, I learned that I am not on board with most everything I used to be cool with/approve of/accept. So I walked through the pain of the misalignment and changed my mind. If I had just kept on accepting everything and everyone I would have been eating alive by now or dead because conforming, twisting and bending my brain, body and spirit to accommodate all the filth out there for the sake of being approved of most assuredly would have sent me back to drinking. We do this deal daily so that we grow to accommodate more light/truth and let go of what doesn't resonate. I suffer more the more I try to fit in with my approval/acceptance of everyone and everything.
On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.
In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.
Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it. pg 86-87